Erap's Knowledge

Little is known of the fact that Erap once applied at a Med School. Listed below are the results of his entrance test dug up from some ancient archives. ANTIBODY: against everyone ARTERY: the study of fine paintings BACTERIA: back door to a cafeteria BENIGN: what you be after you be eight BOWEL: letters like A, E, I, O, or U CAESAREAN SECTION: a district in Rome CARDIOLOGY: advanced study of poker playing CAT SCAN: searching for ones lost kitty CAUTERIZE: made eye contact with her COMA: a punctuation mark CONGENITAL: friendly CORTIZONE: the local courthouse D & C: where Washington is DILATE: to live longer ENEMA: not a friend ER: the things on your head that you hear with FIBRILLATE: to tell lies GENES: blue denim slacks HEMORRHOID: a male from outer space IMPOTENT: distinguished, well known LABOR PAIN: hurt at work MINOR OPERATION: somebody else's ORGAN TRANSPLANT: what you do to your piano when you move PARALYZE: two far-fetched stories PATHOLOGICAL: a reasonable way to go PHARMACIST: person who makes a living dealing in agriculture PROTEIN: in favor of young people RED BLOOD COUNT: Dracula RHEUMATIC: amorous SECRETION: hiding anything TABLET: a small table TERMINAL ILLNESS: getting sick at the airport TIBIA: country in North Africa TRIPLE BYPASS: better than a quarterback sneak TUMOR: an extra pair URINE: opposite of "you're out" VARICOSE: very close VEIN: conceited Would you have Erap as your doctor?

Space Exploration

Our Philippine president attended the United Nations' Meeting. All nations were discussing about space exploration by the year 2000. Here are some of the conversations: China Delegate: "By the year 2000, China will start their moon exploration project. " Russian Delegate: " We too, we are going to explore the moon. This time we will see to it that our cosmonauts will step on the moon." Bill Clinton: " We the United States will also explore the moon for the second time." Philippine President: " By the year 2000, the Philippines will explore the sun." There was a long silence, Bill Clinton stood up and asked the Philippine President: " Isn't it too hot to explore the sun?" Philippine President: ( after a long silence replied) " We will do it in the evening."

When Erap Got Drunk

Erap was at a black tie party along with Reli German who supplied him with a constant flow of Blue Label. All the gentlemen came in black jackets, white shirts and black ties and the ladies in black gowns. Erap thought it was a boring party so he kept drinking his Blue Label to get him through the night. Then he saw a lady in a white gown. "Reli, that's the lady I like," Erap said. "She is a non-conformist and a rebel. I think I will ask her to dance." "Madam, would you care to dance with the President of the Republic?" Erap asked. The lady replied, "No, and I will give you 3 reasons why. Reason No. 1, I don't know how to dance." "That's a legitimate reason," Erap remarked. "Reason No. 2, you are drunk," the lady continued. "That's your opinion," Erap said. "Reason No. 3, I am Cardinal Sin."